Wednesday, February 2, 2011

Everyday, Julie Douglas

Everyday
by Julie Douglas

I miss you

I think about you.

I remember the day you were born,

The uncertain days leading up to your birth,

And the painful days afterwards.

I look at the tiny clothes you wore

spread out next to my bed.

I look at the photo I keep on the fridge

Of you in my arms.

I write about our journey together on my blog.

I talk about you regularly.

I feel lost without you here with me, it is unnatural.

I do things that need to be done

Even though my heart is hurting.

For 11 weeks and 2 days

I have missed you

Everyday

:::

about the piece.
I wrote this poem to mark Charlotte's intended due date on July 2nd, 2010. I wanted to communicate to people who were reading my blog that my grief was on going, it was very much part of my everyday life. -Julie



about the artist.
Julie Douglas' fourth child, Charlotte, who had Trisomy 18, was born at 28 weeks in April 2010. She also recently lost a twelve week pregnancy. Julie's story can be found at We Dreamed of You.

2 comments:

  1. The emotional pain and the physical reality clash in grief. You say "it is unnatural" in your poem, I agree. There is an unfulfilled part of me that will always want my baby, no matter how rational I can be about his health and even though I have 3 living children.

    I am sorry that you have this pain too. Your poem is beautiful. I read some of your blog and Charlottes eulogy and I saw beauty there too. Keep writing. Peace.

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  2. Deeply touching and your powerful writing resonates strongly in that pain filled place within me. I am so sorry for the losses you've experienced. Please keep communicating openly Julie. With my love x

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