Learning is lonely, Louise.

Learning is lonely.
Louise.
Caran d'ache pastels.


:::

about the piece.

I am writing a thesis at the moment– a thesis loaded with emotional connection to Laura. She was with me during most of my MA studies in 2009 – her and I together, beavering away at the endless assignments. I miss her, wriggling around. I miss her, draining me of all my energy, forcing me to sleep, face in my papers at the desk. I miss the weight of her making me wriggle around uncomfortably on my chair. Laura died as I wrote the last piece of my MA course work. My thesis was deferred.

Last November I read about the Creative Everyday Challenge. I loved the idea, but was afraid I would procrastinate my study time away so, when it came to being creative everyday, I thought I’ll take a word from my research each day and make an image with it/from it. Perfect. My thesis is about learning through creative reflection. It all fits.

So I got my sketchbook and wrote “learning” on the top right hand corner of the first page. And there it stayed. All alone. Lonely.

Learning is lonely.

This weekend I revisited it and starting with the blue colour of my desk tried to capture how I feel, here studying without Laura, negotiating around the pearl that she once was, the sadness that fills her absence, the hole where she should be.

Learning is lonely.

--Laura's Mum.

about the artist.
Louise is a mother, a part-time educator/artist/student/writer from the south of Ireland. Laura was her fourth child, a wonderful gift she had hardly dared hope
for. She was born in May 2009, her time on earth already passed. Louise is married to Kieran. Together they are very busy parenting their three living children as they try and come to terms with life without Laura. Louise blogs at Radar of Chance.