Summer Here, Faith Kleppinger

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Summer Here
written and performed by Faith Kleppinger

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about the piece.
Faith talks about her song, "My dear friend Kenny and his wife Terra had an exquisite baby daughter with dark, dark hair, stillborn at 37 weeks in August 2007. Her name is Roxy Jean. This is the first song I wrote after Roxy died. I recorded it because I wanted something to give to Kenny beyond my inadequate words and my constant checking in. I wanted to immortalize Roxy in my own small way, and I wanted to express to my friend that his grief was truly shared; he was not alone. Back then, I adopted a kind of magical thinking that theorized that there was a finite well of misery for all of the world to draw from; and if I absorbed a huge share of it, there might be less for Kenny to have to endure. Not true, of course, but that was my desperate, disordered thinking at the time. After I heard the unimaginable news that Roxy had died, I stood on the subway platform in New York City and lost my mind, all the while keeping a separate corner of what was left of it reserved for this, 'If it hurts this much for me, I can't even imagine what it's like for them.' Truthfully, I still can't imagine it. I was leveled by the forever-ness of Roxy's death, while simultaneously resolving to be as strong as I possibly could for my friend. The words of the song came quickly, once I was ready to write them. It's about grief's ability to trick time, how the seasons collapse and it's the heat of summer and something draws your eye away from the pain and you suddenly notice it's winter. It's about making the world as small as possible, trying to trick yourself into believing that this sweet, perfect baby girl isn't missing all that much--anything to try in vain to make sense of the nonsensical. The song is hard for me to listen to even now, because I hear the choked pain in my singing and it takes me right back to that day. Roxy will always take my breath away. And I would gladly hand over each sad breath that remains in my lungs for Kenny and Terra hear Roxy breathe in and out, just one time."

about the musician.
Faith Kleppinger is a musician and writer who is in awe of what Angie is doing here.