Wednesday, April 20, 2011

I Gave my Child to God, Crystal Theresa Zapanta.

I Gave my Child to God
Ocean Beach, San Francisco, Mothers Day, 2009
Crystal Theresa Zapanta.


about the piece.
After I lost my first baby, my son, Calvin Phoenix, people's well-intentioned wishes for me to "become a parent someday" were extremely hurtful and made me feel very conflicted. I spent my first Mother's Day, two months after this loss, writing names and these two messages on the beach. These photos and statements in the sand were my way of asserting that I am still a mother, even if my baby did not live. - Crystal

about the artist.
I live in San Francisco and am married to my best friend and high school sweetheart, Louie. We will be celebrating 12 years together in May. We do not have any living children, but have been blessed with three precious and deeply missed babies: Calvin Phoenix (lost at 18 weeks, March 5, 2009), Rainbow (lost at 7 weeks, December 10, 2009), and Gaelen (lost at 6 weeks, March 15, 2011).

I have "dabbled" in arts and crafts for as long as I remember, majored in English/Writing, and have dreams of getting an MFA (in creative writing or through a cross-genre/mixed-media program). Because of my babies, I am finding a new voice, greater conviction, and a renewed drive for creative self-expression.

I blog at
These Fragments, I love and also create virtual remembrance cupcakes at Calvin's Cupcakes. - Crystal


  1. Bravo to your empowerment in motherhood Crystal! Your photo brought tears to my eyes and a lump in my throat and a reminder that I'm not alone, thank you so much. Love Janice

  2. What a powerful statement to write Crystal. I see your faith, mothering instinct and love for Calvin expressed here, I can imagine the tears you shed doing it. Love to you, thanks for sharing.

  3. thank you for your sweet comments, ladies <3


What do you think?